How to Deal with Stress
We will discuss and learn how to deal with stress. Stress is the most common aliment of modern age. Stress causes peptic ulcer disease, coronary heart disease, depression, auto immune disease, hypertension, diabetes and even cancer. In milder form it manifests in form of unrest, violence, at work, school and home. Common medical problems like tension headache, insomnia, and obesity are also attributed to unusual stress. None of us are free from stress but some deal with it better than others.Factors Contributing to Stress
- Fear of Unknown
Fear of the unknown and trying to see through and control the destiny.
- Losses in our life
Loss of people and things which are dear to us and our inability to recover those losses.
- Inner conflicts
Inner conflicts between our heart and mind between what is known to be the truth and our failure to accept it as truth. Acceptance of truth may require changing our habits and way of life which we may adhere to for some reason like pleasure, joys, taste, pride in race or heritage etc.
Islamic Perspective to Deal with Stress
Let us examine how Quran deals with such situations.
Be sure we will test you with something of fear and hunger, some loss in goods or lives, but give glad tidings to those who are steadfast, who say when afflicted with calamity: To God we belong and to him is our return. They are those on who (DESCEND) blessings from God and mercy and they are the once that receive guidance. 2:155Al Quran
Thus in Islam, we do not have concept of the ownership of goods and life. Everything belongs to God and returns to him. So if we don't own that thing why mourn our loss?
- Our destiny is predetermined. We do not have control on that part. What we have control over is a limited free will, that is our actions, our choice to do good or bad, to believe in God or not to believe in Him, but we have no control over tomorrow's event not related to our actions i.e. whether my wife will have a son or daughter, whether his/her eyes will be brown or black, or whether I will have an accident or not tomorrow. Worrying over such things is of no use.
- Rejection of faith in Quran is called a disease. This denial of truth is due to arrogance. In their heart there is a disease and God has increased their disease and grievous is their penalty because they lie to themselves. 2:10.
Therefore, after lying to ourselves, we set up an inner conflict - between heart and mind. In order to contain that conflict the mind sends signals to glands for secretion of hormones like adrenaline which leads to rapid heart rate, perspiration, tremor, the basis of lie detector test. This lying conflict could be due to "SMALL" crimes like theft or adultery, or big crimes like rejection of God.
- Nafsul Ammara
The Passionate soul "I do not absolve myself Lo the (human) soul is prone to evil, save that whenever my Lord has mercy. Lo, Lord is forgiving; merciful." 12:53Al Quran (Surah Yusuf)
This soul inclines toward sensual Pleasure, passion and self-gratification, anger, envy, greed, and conceit. Its concerns are pleasure of body, gratification of physical appetite, and ego.
If this evil soul is not checked wire lead to unusual stress and its resultant effects.
- Nafsul Lawanunah (The Reproaching Soul)
Nay, I swear by the reproaching soul" 75:1. This soul is conscious or aware of Evil, resists it, asks for God's grace, and pardon, repents and tries to amend and hopes to achieve salvation.
And (There are) others who have acknowledged their faults. They mix a righteous action with another that was bad. It may be that Allah will relent toward them. Lo! Allah is relenting, merciful. 9:102
This soul warns people of their vain desire, guides and opens the door to virtue and righteousness. It is a positive step in spiritual growth.
- Nafsul Mutmainnah (The satisfied soul)
O (you) soul in (complete) rest and satisfaction. Come back to your Lord, will pleased (yourself) and will pleasing unto him. Enter you then among my devotees, enter you in my heaven. 89:27-30. This is the highest state of spiritual development. satisfied soul is the state of bliss, content and peace. The soul is at peace because it knows that in spite of its failures in this world, it will return to God. Purified of tension, it emerges from the struggle with obstacles blocking the peace of mind and heart.
What should we do in panic and despair? In panic non-believers behave differently than believers. They have no one to return to, to ask for mercy and forgiveness, their life is this life, which they cannot control, thus get more depressed and increase in their state of wrong doing. Then we will see that if they are used to casual drinking will start drinking more and become alcoholic, or a barbital criminal.
On the other hand, a believer should do the following:
- Increase Dhikr (Remembrance of God)
Who have believed and whose heart have Rest in the remembrance of God. Verify in the remembrance of God, do hearts find rest. 13:28Al Quran
- Increase their Prayer
O you who believe, seek help with steadfastness and prayer. For God is with those who are steadfast. 2:153Al Quran
- Ask Forgiveness
And I have said: seek forgiveness from your Lord. Lo He was ever forgiving. 71:10Al Quran
In addition to above we are also asked to continue to struggle to up-grade ourselves. Surely God does not change the condition in which a people are in until they change that which is in themselves. 13:11Al Quran
In summary, I conclude that stress results from lack of inner peace due to conflicts within us and leads to external disturbances in our behavior and health. Inner peace can only be achieved by believing in God, the All Mighty, and remembering him frequently and asking for his help and forgiveness in times of difficulties.